Kempa.com » Alarm clocks

3.2.04

I’ve had the same alarm clock since I was 14, so I’m in the bad habit of ignoring the alarm completely. My first solution was to have the radio turn on at full volume when the alarm went off, but pretty soon I was able to sleep through this, too. Nowadays, to ensure that I get up on time, I set my alarm clock AND the alarm on my cell-phone, and stagger the snoozes by 5 minutes. The result is a relentless alarm-fest for about a half-hour before I finally drag myself out of bed.

Similarly, a friend of mine was once in the habit of plugging a shopvac into one of those wall-socket timers because he had grown immune to the sound of his alarm clock. He would set the power switch of the shopvac to ‘on,’ plug it into the timed outlet, and set the timer to turn on whenever he needed to be up. Impossible to ignore.

Another friend recently alerted me to the existance of ‘Shake Awake:’ a device that goes under your pillow and vibrates at gradually increasing intensity at a set time. The Shake Awake website says:

”A Better Way To Greet The Day! This travel-sized alarm clock fits neatly under a pillow or mattress and its gentle vibrations will jar the deepest sleeper from their slumber. Great for: The “Morning Impaired,” Hearing Impaired Sleepmates on Different Schedules, Busy Travelers, College Roommates, Snoozing Commuters, and Sleepy-Headed Teens.”

The dilligent internet enthusiast has probably already seen the recently released Flavor Flav alarm clock, but I include it here to be thorough. The point of all this is that for some reason, I get the impression that there are some ridiculous alarm clock tales out there. I could be totally wrong, but If you do have something to add, either let me know or post in the comments.

Comments

3.2.04

Joe Cwik says:

Adam, I’ve personally gone throug ha number of alarm clocks because of my growing immunity to them. I’ve managed to even surpass the telephone ring when I used mrwakeup.com to call me. The last method I used was an alarm clock which started out with quiet slow beeps, then increased the frequency, pich, and volume of the beeps every three seconds until it was a blaring sound even a dog would cringe to. I slept through this as well. I currently use a crappy radio alarm, which decides it will go off on time if it decides to. Other days, it sleeps in too.

3.2.04

Chris Hatfield says:

I’ve taken to putting my alarm clock as far away from my bed as possible. That way, I have to get all the way out of bed, stumble to the alarm clock, hit the snooze button and stumble back into bed. This happens at least four times every morning.

Today, for example: In my somnambulistic stupor, I instead hit the “sleep” button (I’ve never been able to figure out what that thing does except make me late for other things), crawled back into bed, and subsequently had a dream about how I had missed my first two classes today. Two hours later, I had, of course, missed my first two classes.

3.2.04

Koppin says:

Who needs an alarm clock when you have…
1. A mother screaming at anything and everything possible at 6:00 am.
2. Brothers who wake up from the screaming and blast whatever bullshit rap album they are listening to that week at house shaking levels to block-out said screams.
3. Dogs that are so afraid of mom’s screams that they will not go downstairs, waking you up by the sound of their pee hitting the floor in a violent manner.

3.31.04

Patch says:

For the ‘Clock the other side of a room’ techinque i found that I had to liberally sprinkle blocks of lego between me and said alarm clock. Always wakes you up.

Alternatly wrap the clock up in a jumper, tie arms of jumper round clock in a very complicated manner. hide clock.

Garunteed to force you to think enough to wake up any sleeping mind.

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