Kempa.com
Contact / About / Archive / Empire / RSS

     Somehow, I managed to not see any advertising for MTV’s ‘I Want a Famous Face‘ and just accidentally stumbled into watching the first episode last night, without any idea what I was about to see. I was flabbergasted. If you missed it, here’s a summary:

Brad Pitt Lovin’ Twin #1: “I’m not very confident, but Brad Pitt is and if I looked like Brad Pitt I would be confident, much like Brad Pitt is. Brad Pitt.”

Brad Pitt Lovin’ Twin #2: “I’m his twin. I’m not very confident, but Brad Pitt is and if I looked like Brad Pitt I would be confident, much like Brad Pitt is. Brad Pitt.”

(Footage of Brad Pitt Twins attempting to dance with ‘the ladies’ at a club, being rejected. Cut to:)

Brad Pitt Twin #1′s crush: “I’m awkwardly shooting you down at this restaurant in front of MTV’s cameras.”

(Thousands of dollars worth of Plastic and oral surgery ensue)

Brad Pitt Twins (In Unison): “Oh man! I’m so hot now! I’m not Brad Pitt but I mean, check it out!”

(Footage of Brad Pitt twins dancing with girls at clubs, being kissed. Cut to:)

Brad Pitt Twin #1′s crush: “You guys are so SEXY.”

FIN.

     Sure, this is the message MTV is SUBLIMINALLY broadcasting to America’s teens every day, but when did they decide that they’re just going to be frank about it? “You’re ugly and people don’t like you. Get plastic surgery.” Really? 100% Flabbergasted. If you want to commit suicide via alcohol poisoning, watch it and drink every time someone says ‘Brad Pitt.’ It’ll work out really well, because about 29 minutes in you’ll realize that you spent the last 29 minutes watching this show and want to kill yourself, and then you’ll die.

     Did you know that the Matt Salinger who played Captain America in the href=”http://imdb.com/title/tt0103923/”>early 90′s movie adaptation is J.D. Salinger’s son? He was also in ‘Revenge of the Nerds.’ Weird. When I was going through my ‘extremely cool’ pre-teen phase, I was obsessed with Captain America, and rented the movie more than once. Good times.

     I’m not sure if it’s redundant to be writing about comments on older entries here or not, but if you were one of the (very) few who enjoyed those vinyl posts, you might want to know that several interesting comments have popped up on each entry. Also, the last time I asked questions, people answered some in the comments, and some via email. Many posted their rules to that circle game, Will noted that Elliott Smith was not mentioned at the Oscars and explained that this is Babelfish, and several folks pointed out that Karaoke Revolution for the PS2 does indeed measure pitch! (I’ll be renting it as soon as humanly possible, so expect all kinds of REAL COOL details.)

Will writes:

“Are you aware of the Tennessee Squires? It’s an organization started by Jack Daniels’ family, and the only criterion for joining is that a member has to invite you in. My roommate Pat already was one and he invited my roommate Jeff. What’s great is they send you this certificate with a letter and a badge and stuff, and it gives you this speech about how friendship is in decline in this day and age and it’s the Squires’ job to bring it back. Very Southern Gentleman-esque. Pretty funny.”
- Will

“I forgot. The best thing about the Tennessee Squires is that when you become one, you get your own plot of land on the Jack Daniels estate. No shit.”
- Will

Anyone out there have the ability to make me a Tennessee Squire?

     You should probably be aware that Congress is presently attempting to do away with checks and balances, so that they can do whatever they damn well please. Found via Metafilter. The title of the bill:

H.R.3920 Title: To allow Congress to reverse the judgments of the United States Supreme Court.

     This is a real bill, searchable from congress.gov. Some highlights from the metafilter discussion:

     ”However, if the bill passes and the executive and legislative branch both ignore the Supreme Courts immediately striking it down, things could get VERY ugly in America very, very quickly.” – Ryvar

     ”Would introducing a bill which would destroy the constitution be considered treasonous? Certainly doesn’t seem very patriotic to suggest destroying your own government.” – Fantt

     ”Interesting question, Fantt. The congressional oath of office (all offices in the federal government as well as in the armed forces) includes a pludge to protect and defend the Constitution of the USA. Presumably they were talking about the document and not the old wooden ship. So, a very liberal interpretation of the oath would rule out trying to dismantle the the Consitution. I am sure, however, that the champions of the bill would argue that they are trying to strengthen it.” – psmealey

etc…

Random Zombies links:

  • Complete listing of all Colin Blunstone / Alan Parsons Collaborations: here.
  • New ‘Zombies’ album, featuring principals Blunstone and Rod Argent.

     Finally, I thought you should all know that I just got a spam email from ‘Pooshoes.’ So great. “Oh man, Good ‘ol Pooshoes finally wrote me back!”